The different perception of expenditure can lead to conflict when the man thinks his work has earned him, say, 20 points and deserves corresponding recognition, while the woman has assigned him only 1 point and recognizes him accordingly. To a woman, the emotional stroke delivered by sincere attention is inseparable from the act. Larger blocks of points (20, 30, 40 points, etc.) go to what they consider bigger expenditures. Men, on the other hand, assign small acts, small expenditures, fewer points. Each individual act of love gets one point, regardless of magnitude. ![]() He says women use a points system which few men are aware of. Gray further asserts men and women view giving and receiving love differently, how individual actions intended as loving expressions are “tallied up.” According to Gray, women and men are often surprised to find their partners “keep score” at all, or that their scoring methods widely differ. This is a time when only communication can help to bring the relationship back into balance. If the balance shifts, one person feeling they have given more than they have received, resentment can develop. ![]() Gray writes how men and women each monitor the amount of give and take in relationships. Mixer Grinder, Wet Grinders, Blender & Choppers.
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